Gettin' Down to Business

So I have my A-Level exams coming up and I'm still not sure on how I will do. I mean I'm aware of all my subjects and what I have to revise and remember, just that my brain cannot fully function! But I think thats just nerves and what have you. But i really want to make a go of it, i didn't spend my whole life in education to come out at the end worse off than i thought i would be. I think it's because I have so many things I would like to do, which I can't find one specific subject i love and would like to take into my future.

For example; I would love to be a perfessional photographer, however you need money for the equipment and skills I just can't seem to get the jist of. I mean i take alot of good photographs, but I just would like to be able to have one of those fancy cameras and be able to travel to the places I love to take photographs at.

I also would love to be an indepth Geographer/Geologist, not specificly a teacher, as I can't handle kids or people for that matter. But Iwould love to know everything in the world, where things are, how things happen, ectect. This takes huge amount of paitence and understanding and knowledge I just can't handle.

I have began to like journalisim too, which I think fits in well with how much I like photography, it would help alot and one of the main reasons I do Blogs is to see how well I can write and be able to capture attention with words. It would take alot of courage and disadvantages to get into this kind of business but I think I would enjoy it, and that's what life is about. If you don't enjoy your life and what you do in it, then I don't think you could fully enjoy anything you do.

I guess if I want to persue my deams and goals I will have to work extremely hard for them, like everyone else does. I just wish things could be as simple and easy as they are on paper.

Oh My Days

I really don't understand people these days. They either can make you really happy or just really upset and angry! I can't help but feel so much remorse for these people! And I just don't know whether I can take it. My emotions run high 24/7 and I have no control over falling apart over something so so so stupid! I mean I was even watching the film Wall-e and I cried! 

Why do some people have no idea how they make over people feel? Either they are totally oblivious to it or they just know having resentment is the best way to feel about these things. I want to know why people can have such a hold over someone and not know that they are destroying every last inch if their bones! 

My head is all over the place, and with people treating me like I'm nothing better than something you tred on then what's the point in trying to make it work? The most awful thing about it all is that it seems to be all my fault. Because I'm apparently such a bad person and because I have maybe more issues than some other 'sane' person that I can't be perfect like apparently everyone else but me is. 

Sorry for the rant! I can't sleep and I'm filling up with anger every second that people don't realize whats happening. Tarra! Peace keys <3