So I have my A-Level exams coming up and I'm still not sure on how I will do. I mean I'm aware of all my subjects and what I have to revise and remember, just that my brain cannot fully function! But I think thats just nerves and what have you. But i really want to make a go of it, i didn't spend my whole life in education to come out at the end worse off than i thought i would be. I think it's because I have so many things I would like to do, which I can't find one specific subject i love and would like to take into my future.
For example; I would love to be a perfessional photographer, however you need money for the equipment and skills I just can't seem to get the jist of. I mean i take alot of good photographs, but I just would like to be able to have one of those fancy cameras and be able to travel to the places I love to take photographs at.
I also would love to be an indepth Geographer/Geologist, not specificly a teacher, as I can't handle kids or people for that matter. But Iwould love to know everything in the world, where things are, how things happen, ectect. This takes huge amount of paitence and understanding and knowledge I just can't handle.
I have began to like journalisim too, which I think fits in well with how much I like photography, it would help alot and one of the main reasons I do Blogs is to see how well I can write and be able to capture attention with words. It would take alot of courage and disadvantages to get into this kind of business but I think I would enjoy it, and that's what life is about. If you don't enjoy your life and what you do in it, then I don't think you could fully enjoy anything you do.
I guess if I want to persue my deams and goals I will have to work extremely hard for them, like everyone else does. I just wish things could be as simple and easy as they are on paper.
Thursday, 26 April 2012
Saturday, 14 April 2012
Oh My Days
I really don't understand people these days. They either can make you really happy or just really upset and angry! I can't help but feel so much remorse for these people! And I just don't know whether I can take it. My emotions run high 24/7 and I have no control over falling apart over something so so so stupid! I mean I was even watching the film Wall-e and I cried!
Why do some people have no idea how they make over people feel? Either they are totally oblivious to it or they just know having resentment is the best way to feel about these things. I want to know why people can have such a hold over someone and not know that they are destroying every last inch if their bones!
My head is all over the place, and with people treating me like I'm nothing better than something you tred on then what's the point in trying to make it work? The most awful thing about it all is that it seems to be all my fault. Because I'm apparently such a bad person and because I have maybe more issues than some other 'sane' person that I can't be perfect like apparently everyone else but me is.
Sorry for the rant! I can't sleep and I'm filling up with anger every second that people don't realize whats happening. Tarra! Peace keys <3
Why do some people have no idea how they make over people feel? Either they are totally oblivious to it or they just know having resentment is the best way to feel about these things. I want to know why people can have such a hold over someone and not know that they are destroying every last inch if their bones!
My head is all over the place, and with people treating me like I'm nothing better than something you tred on then what's the point in trying to make it work? The most awful thing about it all is that it seems to be all my fault. Because I'm apparently such a bad person and because I have maybe more issues than some other 'sane' person that I can't be perfect like apparently everyone else but me is.
Sorry for the rant! I can't sleep and I'm filling up with anger every second that people don't realize whats happening. Tarra! Peace keys <3
Friday, 30 March 2012
Why we do what we do
I suppose the title of this needs explaining. Well why do we do what we do? Meaning, why do we lie, cheat, love, lust, everything under the sun that compells us to do the things we do. Now instead of repeating the words ' Why we do what we do' i'm going to narrow it down so it's not so repetative to #WWDWWD if that makes sense?
To start off with: Telling blatant L I E S.
Well this can mean many of things. But to make it more simple. Why do we lie? I don't think theres any explaination of #WWDWWD that can come into this but when we think of lies, we often come to conclusion of that person is not TRUSTworthy. Not true! Some people lie because it's the only way of not telling the truth, as telling the truth is easy. Now i'm not saying that lies are much appreciated, but take for example you needed to lie because the truth would hurt not only the person your telling it too, but yourself aswell. Then theres a thought of, why not tell the truth so you both can be uplifted of the lie. Well yes sometimes that is better, but no-one can say a lie isn't worth telling. Truth and Lies can mean so much that both can be easier or harder to portray. But when it comes down to it, lieing is the easest way to get yourself out of the trouble that you are in. But telling the truth may reveal some terrible things, but once out in the open it's much easier to live with the truth than to live with a lie.
To make this un-gloomy, i'll second this off with: Why do we love?
Now i've wrote about love many times in my blog, either some bad or good. But either way Love is a word i prefer to use less often as i possibly can. Because Love can either make or break someones life, but there is a road to Love where at the end there is what some people call ' the light in love'. So theres me thinking could it actually be a word that can mean nothing and everything. People can Love for all types of reasons, just for the plain reason of loving someone because your heart overpowers your mind, or a reason of loving for money ect.. But Love can entitle a rollercoaster of rides. Yes i know very petty. And yes, i think to a certain extent i can love and i do love. But when can you tell that what you know and feel is actually LOVE? Well you don't.. because throughout your life, i'm sure of this, that you will love, you will get your heart broken multipul times, until you find the 'one'. And i'm totally sure that 'the one' may have come and gone in your life. But even if you spend 25 years living together, having kids and all the rest. Love can deteriorate just with a blink of an eye. So does that mean the 'end'? NO! ofcourse it doesn't! there's plently more time for you to fall in love, just don't think that the 'end' is the end, because there are bigger and better things in life to fall for, like PIGS! ha.
Going off topic seems to be my key inspiration in these blogs, but as i have said before, and i will over and over AND OVER again! Topics can spiral into many other things.
This blog is very long winded, and i'm not sure if you have read it all but if your reading this, THANK YOU! I love sharing things on here, and one day when i'm much MUCH older i will read these probably thinking ' WHAT IS THIS? but i will know that one day i felt like writing about all these things, and come to understand what a hectic life i had when i was in my teens, and what i went through and what i felt!
Once again thank you for reading. And i'm sure i will be posting more blogs when i have much more time to concentrate on my feelings. But that's difficult as i have so many. And i could literally write all day, time would past by and i wouldn't even think of it. Just like now..
Peacekeys <3 (p/s my next blog won't be so long!)
To start off with: Telling blatant L I E S.
Well this can mean many of things. But to make it more simple. Why do we lie? I don't think theres any explaination of #WWDWWD that can come into this but when we think of lies, we often come to conclusion of that person is not TRUSTworthy. Not true! Some people lie because it's the only way of not telling the truth, as telling the truth is easy. Now i'm not saying that lies are much appreciated, but take for example you needed to lie because the truth would hurt not only the person your telling it too, but yourself aswell. Then theres a thought of, why not tell the truth so you both can be uplifted of the lie. Well yes sometimes that is better, but no-one can say a lie isn't worth telling. Truth and Lies can mean so much that both can be easier or harder to portray. But when it comes down to it, lieing is the easest way to get yourself out of the trouble that you are in. But telling the truth may reveal some terrible things, but once out in the open it's much easier to live with the truth than to live with a lie.
To make this un-gloomy, i'll second this off with: Why do we love?
Now i've wrote about love many times in my blog, either some bad or good. But either way Love is a word i prefer to use less often as i possibly can. Because Love can either make or break someones life, but there is a road to Love where at the end there is what some people call ' the light in love'. So theres me thinking could it actually be a word that can mean nothing and everything. People can Love for all types of reasons, just for the plain reason of loving someone because your heart overpowers your mind, or a reason of loving for money ect.. But Love can entitle a rollercoaster of rides. Yes i know very petty. And yes, i think to a certain extent i can love and i do love. But when can you tell that what you know and feel is actually LOVE? Well you don't.. because throughout your life, i'm sure of this, that you will love, you will get your heart broken multipul times, until you find the 'one'. And i'm totally sure that 'the one' may have come and gone in your life. But even if you spend 25 years living together, having kids and all the rest. Love can deteriorate just with a blink of an eye. So does that mean the 'end'? NO! ofcourse it doesn't! there's plently more time for you to fall in love, just don't think that the 'end' is the end, because there are bigger and better things in life to fall for, like PIGS! ha.
Going off topic seems to be my key inspiration in these blogs, but as i have said before, and i will over and over AND OVER again! Topics can spiral into many other things.
This blog is very long winded, and i'm not sure if you have read it all but if your reading this, THANK YOU! I love sharing things on here, and one day when i'm much MUCH older i will read these probably thinking ' WHAT IS THIS? but i will know that one day i felt like writing about all these things, and come to understand what a hectic life i had when i was in my teens, and what i went through and what i felt!
Once again thank you for reading. And i'm sure i will be posting more blogs when i have much more time to concentrate on my feelings. But that's difficult as i have so many. And i could literally write all day, time would past by and i wouldn't even think of it. Just like now..
Peacekeys <3 (p/s my next blog won't be so long!)
One Little Thing
Have you ever read something that killed you inside? Like a text message or someone's status. Everything was going fine until you accidentally came across something you didn't want to read. Or found out something you were better off not knowing. It's almost as if it was posted just to purposely hurt you. But you constantly read it over and over again to torture yourself. It sucks how one little thing can ruin your whole day.
Wednesday, 21 March 2012
Friday, 24 February 2012
It works like this..
I want to be able to come here and not be forced into wiritng something about me or my life, yet everytime I have something to say about either of the two, then I drift away into many things which is actually wrong, well not this time.
For the first time in a while, I've actually started enjoying doing things, maybe it's because I've 'seen the light' and moved on from everything, but then again I still have moments where I think my life could be much more better, or much more worse for that matter. I feel renewed and as I'm concerntrating on my College work and my future more than rather looking back into my past. I think thats whats been stopping me, always looking into my past for answers, which has stopped me from getting on with my future. Well now I feel like this I reckon, I could spiral into a new beginning.
After all thats happened, I finally think about what could happen and what is happening. Concerntrating on much more important stuff rather than dwelling on things that are going wrong, but focusing on the moments that go right (for a change). And i think it's because I'm acutally enjoying doing things rather than doing what I used to do, and concerntrating on myself ( even though that may seem selfish) but I've always concerntrated on the other person rather than me. Selfish isn't a bad thing sometimes, It's good to have a little self control over yourself, rather than everyone else.
Yes I know I've gone into that stage again, talking about myself, but it's my blogs! ha. Anyway the moral of this is that I feel like a change is coming along, and I can't wait to feel even more happy!
Peace Keys <3
For the first time in a while, I've actually started enjoying doing things, maybe it's because I've 'seen the light' and moved on from everything, but then again I still have moments where I think my life could be much more better, or much more worse for that matter. I feel renewed and as I'm concerntrating on my College work and my future more than rather looking back into my past. I think thats whats been stopping me, always looking into my past for answers, which has stopped me from getting on with my future. Well now I feel like this I reckon, I could spiral into a new beginning.
After all thats happened, I finally think about what could happen and what is happening. Concerntrating on much more important stuff rather than dwelling on things that are going wrong, but focusing on the moments that go right (for a change). And i think it's because I'm acutally enjoying doing things rather than doing what I used to do, and concerntrating on myself ( even though that may seem selfish) but I've always concerntrated on the other person rather than me. Selfish isn't a bad thing sometimes, It's good to have a little self control over yourself, rather than everyone else.
Yes I know I've gone into that stage again, talking about myself, but it's my blogs! ha. Anyway the moral of this is that I feel like a change is coming along, and I can't wait to feel even more happy!
Peace Keys <3
Wednesday, 15 February 2012
The on going problem, no one seems to know..
We really don't know how lucky we are... Even the richest country in the world (America) have poor people that go without everything a poor person in the UK goes without. For example; we don't have to pay for our healthcare, and when we do, it's not putting a massive £20,000 hole in our pockets. The Government say that over 96% of poor people say that theres not 1 day they went hungry during an annual, but that doesnt mean to count out the other 4% which live in flash flood tunnels, having to eat rats for tea don't go hungry. "Poor people have more than we do, with there HD tv's, ect" This is true however, when can you say that you've never not been hungry or been so ill and not been cured? People have so many different opinions on society but no one gets heard. I feel so sorry for our growing population to never get what once was good.
The President of the US - Obama, well in 2009 he said he would change the US class states, allowing the bottom class to be treated like the middle class, however now in 2012 little has been done, and even more people from the beginning of 2009 are out of work and are uninsured with health care what so ever this percentage has been doubled. The Government now say that during 2013-14 will be the years of changing. But that might be too late! The conference taken by the CNN was debating whether or not to let someone in a coma die because he had no health cover for what he needed, many of the audience shouted ' LET HIM DIE', Not one of them said to let him live, so has this what it has come to? Amercians would let fellow Americans die because they have no Health cover to pay for life?
This is totally sickening, even for being a British Citizen and having let even a richer country other than the UK let things get to that extreme measure. No one should have that right, Health care all over the world should be free! I'm sure you can make money off of other things rather letting people die, Yes poorly developed countries such as Africa, well they dont have the money or the development skills to let healthcare be such a big issue, but when countries which have a income of much more than even the UK has and we survive with FREE healthcare, then surely such a big country like America can up hold this.
Rant over, but this is mainly why alot of people HATE America, amongst other probems, but it's one of my main reasons. There's lots of things to love, but adding up the pro's and con's can be difficult.
Peace keys <3
The President of the US - Obama, well in 2009 he said he would change the US class states, allowing the bottom class to be treated like the middle class, however now in 2012 little has been done, and even more people from the beginning of 2009 are out of work and are uninsured with health care what so ever this percentage has been doubled. The Government now say that during 2013-14 will be the years of changing. But that might be too late! The conference taken by the CNN was debating whether or not to let someone in a coma die because he had no health cover for what he needed, many of the audience shouted ' LET HIM DIE', Not one of them said to let him live, so has this what it has come to? Amercians would let fellow Americans die because they have no Health cover to pay for life?
This is totally sickening, even for being a British Citizen and having let even a richer country other than the UK let things get to that extreme measure. No one should have that right, Health care all over the world should be free! I'm sure you can make money off of other things rather letting people die, Yes poorly developed countries such as Africa, well they dont have the money or the development skills to let healthcare be such a big issue, but when countries which have a income of much more than even the UK has and we survive with FREE healthcare, then surely such a big country like America can up hold this.
Rant over, but this is mainly why alot of people HATE America, amongst other probems, but it's one of my main reasons. There's lots of things to love, but adding up the pro's and con's can be difficult.
Peace keys <3
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